What Does It Take To Raise Up A Winner?

As many of you readers know, I like to go on runs, refreshingly long runs. As I was running the other day, I could not help but think about all the little kids out on the soccer field. Some of those little ones give it their all to make their parents proud. Some of them work hard to be the best, some of them work hard to get a rest. I can remember not too long ago being out in a different field, playing the same game. That game did not mean a whole lot to me; in fact I was one of the ones working hard to get a seat on the bench. Soccer is tough for those of us who have not been blessed with such skills or interests in being a great soccer player.

Running around that soccer field, I could not help but think of the defeat that many kids face these days. They work hard, just to learn that they are not good enough. They want to be valued; they want to be good enough.

It is obvious in the world of sports that not everyone can win. I do not think everyone should win. Winning takes effort; it takes skill. Winning separates those who are serious about the game, from those who just show up. Winning takes character and determination. It shapes our lives towards victory. It impacts our health, our relationships, and our ability to have fun.

Teaching our kids to work hard and win is fantastic. However, three words kept coming back to me as I was running around those soccer fields just a few evenings ago. The three words repeated in my mind: "and then what?" These young kids, from age four on up, win the game. And then what? Do their parents teach them that they are better than everyone else, or do they congratulate their children for working hard and giving it their all? For the kids who were on the losing team, do their parents teach that winning is the key to their self-worth, or do they teach that they are valued and should not waste a second on negative thinking? Are we teaching our kids that their value is derived from their performance, or are we teaching them that they have immeasurable value from their Creator?

It is not a coincidence that those who know they have value are the one's who usually perform the best. In fact, when kids know they are loved and valued, they have all the reason in the world to do their best. They have nothing to lose. In H. Jackson Brown, Jr.'s book, "Life's Little Instruction Book," he says to "Work hard to create in your children a good self-image. It's the most important thing you can do to insure their success." The key is not valuing your children for winning, it's valuing your children before they win.

John C. Maxwell talks a lot about adding value to people. Parents can lead their children to performing better in school, in sports, and at home by letting them know that they are valuable and created in the image of God. We can create winners by letting our kids win first at home.